When I started my daily column in 2015, it was a course-correction and I didn’t fully understand the downstream implications.
That became abundantly clear for me today when I opened an email looking for new writing submissions. thanks to an email that landed in my inbox. I was sitting in my office feeling conflicted about the falling snow outside. Fat flakes wafted past a backdrop of pine needles and that’s the kind of scene that makes my nervous system kick off its shoes and get comfortable. But I’m also desperately ready for sunshine-and-short-sleeves season.
Even so, it served as the perfect ambiance for re-reading a couple of my old essays to judge their fit for the pitch-call. I should clarify that I’m not someone who revisits old work. I don’t look at old pictures, I don’t read old journals, I don’t pour over childhood mementos. But this seemed a fitting reason to go looking—especially since I’ve been keen to pitch more of my writing to publishers. And, as I read, I felt more and more torn between thinking it was good and wondering why my more recent stuff felt like it might’ve slipped pretty substantially…
what happened??
Surprisingly, it didn’t take all that much sleuthing to figure it out. Looking back, it seems kind of like I used to write like a journalist, but… you know, while publishing personal essays. And some of my essays in that style seemed to really connect with folks. At least, that’s the vibe I got while re-reading today at my desk. By summer 2025, though, I’d noticed a growing translation gap in my writing where the distance between myself and my readers started feeling pretty significant. Which is part of what led me to start writing a daily column. It seemed like a great way to get more storytelling reps by practicing with a shorter format. After 205 days in a row of publishing that column, I feel as though I’ve been successful in closing the gap.
Throughout that time, I’ve also been writing weekly Substack essays and promoting the column at the end, but those have never felt quite right if I’m honest. It’s like my problem inverted itself—now it feels like the daily column both carries my voice and resonates with readers, but the essays don’t. And I finally get why: the essays I’m writing are story-driven with no closure, because they’re following the format of a column.
Whoops…
This just in: Old dog learns new trick, forgets all others.
Looking up from my computer and out the window at the snowy scenery, a potential solution feels clear to me now… keep writing my daily column, but stop stitching together weekly vignettes for Substack.
Instead, I think properly reintroducing long-form essays to my publishing practice—without weekly pressure—could be a good bridge. That might put me back in “my lane.” Better yet, it feels like it will help me honor my “zone of excellence.” And, I’ve realized, I’m most likely to get there by blending my approaches: combining the journalistic essayist and the personal-story-driven daily columnist. That seems like it allows me to surface insights and frame them in a way people can really sit with, which has always been my goal.
-onward.
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